Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Sunday, April 4, 2010
OCD, much?
I don't know if people have looked into obsessive compulsive behaviour and its relationship to religious rituals. I personally know a number of people who would restart their prayers several time (each prayer time, mind you) because they are worried that they missed a step.
Religious rituals like prayer often follow a set of procedures, usually clearly proscribed. For Muslims, ablutions, clean clothing is a must and the prayers follow a certain timeline daily. As a child, I was taught that there are many rules governing the prayer rituals and missing/screwing any will mean that I have to start from scratch.
It made me very anxious about prayers as a child; and I am sure there are many who had similar experience. For some, this anxiety spills over into adulthood, or rather, become transmogrified into obsessive compulsive disorder. OCD affects people across the board, regardless of faith (or lack of them) but I do wonder if emphasis on formalities and ritualistic behaviour has anything to do with the development of OCD.
You have people who wash their hands multiple times or wipe their feet or jiggle all doorknobs three times before entering and so on and so forth. If you ask them to reflect on when these behaviour pattern start to dominate their life, could they pinpoint it? Is it related to certain admonishments (wash your hands or you'll be eating germs!) or traumatic events (the passing of a loved one) or both?
For those who find difficulty in coping with a life bound by such compulsions, help is available. Counselling and help is offered by psychologists and psychiatrists. There is nothing to be ashamed of; we all have our quirks and escapes from the bell curve of normality.
For those who always find their thoughts dominted by was was or syak or uncertainty during prayer, do read what the lovely Dr Asri has to say about this. This is definitely one of the reasons he is my favourite religious scholar of this generation.
Religious rituals like prayer often follow a set of procedures, usually clearly proscribed. For Muslims, ablutions, clean clothing is a must and the prayers follow a certain timeline daily. As a child, I was taught that there are many rules governing the prayer rituals and missing/screwing any will mean that I have to start from scratch.
It made me very anxious about prayers as a child; and I am sure there are many who had similar experience. For some, this anxiety spills over into adulthood, or rather, become transmogrified into obsessive compulsive disorder. OCD affects people across the board, regardless of faith (or lack of them) but I do wonder if emphasis on formalities and ritualistic behaviour has anything to do with the development of OCD.
You have people who wash their hands multiple times or wipe their feet or jiggle all doorknobs three times before entering and so on and so forth. If you ask them to reflect on when these behaviour pattern start to dominate their life, could they pinpoint it? Is it related to certain admonishments (wash your hands or you'll be eating germs!) or traumatic events (the passing of a loved one) or both?
For those who find difficulty in coping with a life bound by such compulsions, help is available. Counselling and help is offered by psychologists and psychiatrists. There is nothing to be ashamed of; we all have our quirks and escapes from the bell curve of normality.
For those who always find their thoughts dominted by was was or syak or uncertainty during prayer, do read what the lovely Dr Asri has to say about this. This is definitely one of the reasons he is my favourite religious scholar of this generation.
Thursday, April 1, 2010
In praise of unfaithfulness
Monogamy is overrated.
In friendships, at least. *grin*
I am blessed that I have a friend for every activity I enjoy. I have my movie kaki, my TV geek kaki, my foodie kaki and so on. My friends are a wonderful and diverse bunch, very much a smorgasbord. As delightful as they are, they can't all share all of my interest so I have a special pal for every occasion. Aren't I lucky?
So here's to friends: long may they enrich your life!
In friendships, at least. *grin*
I am blessed that I have a friend for every activity I enjoy. I have my movie kaki, my TV geek kaki, my foodie kaki and so on. My friends are a wonderful and diverse bunch, very much a smorgasbord. As delightful as they are, they can't all share all of my interest so I have a special pal for every occasion. Aren't I lucky?
So here's to friends: long may they enrich your life!
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Give the mike to me!
It never failed to get my goat when Western writers write dismissively of how Islam is the reason Muslim women are oppressed / victimised / depersonalised etc etc etc. The misconception of Islam particularly by Western (or Western-trained feminists) tend to magnify misogynistic practices (that is commonly cultural, rather than religious) into painting Muslim women as victims in general. This writer made a persuasive argument why there must be a better approach towards highlighting the problems faced by Muslim women the world over and why it is important that Muslim women themselves work towards this goal.
I am fortunate to live in a Muslim country where a Muslim woman can get an education, go out to work, get married to whom she wants and wear pretty much what she wants. Reading some of the work by the sublime Fatima Mernissi and the experiences of Muslim women in other countries (particularly west of 101 degrees East) made me truly appreciate how wonderful my country can be.
Not saying that all is hunky dory here for the Muslim ladies; divorce still tend to favour men and the Syariah court is hideously slow and toothless when it comes to child support and ta'liq (conditional divorce; the man swears before witnesses during the wedding solemnisation ceremony that his wife can apply for divorce if he deserts her and/or did not provide material support and/or did not provide sexual relations and/or abuses her. The theory is that in such cases, the wife may bring supporting material to support desertion/abuse claim and the Syariah Court is to grant her a near automatic divorce.).
But surely the first religion to allow women to inherit, obtain divorce and choose her husband can not be all bad, right?
I am fortunate to live in a Muslim country where a Muslim woman can get an education, go out to work, get married to whom she wants and wear pretty much what she wants. Reading some of the work by the sublime Fatima Mernissi and the experiences of Muslim women in other countries (particularly west of 101 degrees East) made me truly appreciate how wonderful my country can be.
Not saying that all is hunky dory here for the Muslim ladies; divorce still tend to favour men and the Syariah court is hideously slow and toothless when it comes to child support and ta'liq (conditional divorce; the man swears before witnesses during the wedding solemnisation ceremony that his wife can apply for divorce if he deserts her and/or did not provide material support and/or did not provide sexual relations and/or abuses her. The theory is that in such cases, the wife may bring supporting material to support desertion/abuse claim and the Syariah Court is to grant her a near automatic divorce.).
But surely the first religion to allow women to inherit, obtain divorce and choose her husband can not be all bad, right?
Saturday, March 20, 2010
Pictorial shits and giggles
Not the bedmate of your dreams.
It's not just Tom Hanks in The Green Mile.
Literal, much?
Ole!
My, what a big ... rocket ... you've got. *titter*
There's some really sick shit in comics, no?
Keep it flowing, baby!
Bonding moment: lost.
And we used to fear katak pisang in the bathroom in the olden days *pfft*
Balancing skillz; I has 'em.
Very true!
And the winner of this year's Darwin's award is ...
Because in a war, you never know what the right hand is doing.
Hindsight: always 20/20 (*sigh*)
It's not just Tom Hanks in The Green Mile.
Literal, much?
Ole!
My, what a big ... rocket ... you've got. *titter*
There's some really sick shit in comics, no?
Keep it flowing, baby!
Bonding moment: lost.
And we used to fear katak pisang in the bathroom in the olden days *pfft*
Balancing skillz; I has 'em.
Very true!
And the winner of this year's Darwin's award is ...
Because in a war, you never know what the right hand is doing.
Hindsight: always 20/20 (*sigh*)
Chewing the fat
The world is full of terrible people who likes nothing better than to pigeon-hole others; may be it makes their lives easier if they can categorise individuals (a la non-scientific Linnaeus). But the uglier truth is that many people enjoy putting others down to make themselves feel better.
Skin colour, height, size, employment, disability, sexual orientation, social mobility, religion etc etc etc is fair game for segregating people into the category known as "Others". These "Other" people are denigrated, scoffed, ridiculed and held in contempt because they are different. For certain criterion, such as body size, the negative reaction can be really overwhelming.
Reading this article is very sobering, but not really surprising. How many of us have gone to a physician, asking for help and was met with contemptuous dismissal? I suppose doctors are human too and have all the requisite human failures like a meanness of spirit or prejudice, however inadvertent.
This line from the article gave me chills.
"Over the last few years, fat people have become scapegoats for all manner of cultural ills."
From global warming to skyrocketing healthcare cost? Oh wow. Surely it has nothing to do with people relishing high-energy lifestyle that strains the world's resources. *insert eye rolling*
Another line that got me thinking was " ... who wouldn’t dream of disparaging anyone’s color, sex, economic status or general attractiveness, yet feel free to comment witheringly on a person’s weight."
People seem to think that criticising you is a way of showing their concern, but I think they ought to examine their motives a little closer. Is it really concern that motivates you or is it just a way for you to feel superior over the other person? If it is the first, are you aware whether the language you used was hurtful or did you make an attempt to be clear but with consideration of that person's feelings?
Please, you can lie to others but you shouldn't lie to yourself. Your expression, body language and word choice speaks loudly of your true intention. Let's be honest. You want to make yourself feel better by making someone else feel bad about themselves. You do think that you are better than that person and that you have the right to speak what you want because you're just "concerned and being honest about the issue".
So before you want to make a personal remark to someone else regarding their appearance (or marital status and other potential minefield topics), stop and think for a while. Consider why you need to say it; if you have run out of casual conversational gambits, try the weather. It is better to be boring than to be unpardonably rude.
Just sayin'.
Skin colour, height, size, employment, disability, sexual orientation, social mobility, religion etc etc etc is fair game for segregating people into the category known as "Others". These "Other" people are denigrated, scoffed, ridiculed and held in contempt because they are different. For certain criterion, such as body size, the negative reaction can be really overwhelming.
Reading this article is very sobering, but not really surprising. How many of us have gone to a physician, asking for help and was met with contemptuous dismissal? I suppose doctors are human too and have all the requisite human failures like a meanness of spirit or prejudice, however inadvertent.
This line from the article gave me chills.
"Over the last few years, fat people have become scapegoats for all manner of cultural ills."
From global warming to skyrocketing healthcare cost? Oh wow. Surely it has nothing to do with people relishing high-energy lifestyle that strains the world's resources. *insert eye rolling*
Another line that got me thinking was " ... who wouldn’t dream of disparaging anyone’s color, sex, economic status or general attractiveness, yet feel free to comment witheringly on a person’s weight."
People seem to think that criticising you is a way of showing their concern, but I think they ought to examine their motives a little closer. Is it really concern that motivates you or is it just a way for you to feel superior over the other person? If it is the first, are you aware whether the language you used was hurtful or did you make an attempt to be clear but with consideration of that person's feelings?
Please, you can lie to others but you shouldn't lie to yourself. Your expression, body language and word choice speaks loudly of your true intention. Let's be honest. You want to make yourself feel better by making someone else feel bad about themselves. You do think that you are better than that person and that you have the right to speak what you want because you're just "concerned and being honest about the issue".
So before you want to make a personal remark to someone else regarding their appearance (or marital status and other potential minefield topics), stop and think for a while. Consider why you need to say it; if you have run out of casual conversational gambits, try the weather. It is better to be boring than to be unpardonably rude.
Just sayin'.
Monday, March 15, 2010
No escape in dreamscape?
I dreamt that I had dengue haemorrhagic fever (while in some kind of stereotypical mad scientist lair) and was debating with myself whether I should go to the hospital. And who should take me.
All this while I graduated from mild petechiae into downright frightful ecchymoses. Contemplating my platelet level. Have I hit the teens or am I still in the lower twenties?
What the hell is my subconscious trying to tell me????
All I know is that even in my dream, I am still a nerd.
*sigh*
All this while I graduated from mild petechiae into downright frightful ecchymoses. Contemplating my platelet level. Have I hit the teens or am I still in the lower twenties?
What the hell is my subconscious trying to tell me????
All I know is that even in my dream, I am still a nerd.
*sigh*
Thursday, March 11, 2010
One liners
1.My husband and I divorced over religious differences.
He thought he was God and I didn't!
2.I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
4. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
5. Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive.
6. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
7. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
8. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
9. I'm not a complete idiot. Some parts are just missing.
10.Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
11. God must love stupid people; he made so many.
12. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
13. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
14. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
15. Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it!
16. Wrinkled was not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up.
17. Procrastinate Now!
18. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
19.A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
20. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
21.He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.
22.A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand
times the memory.
23. Ham and eggs ... a day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment
for a pig.
24. The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.
25. I smile because I don't know what the heck is going on.
He thought he was God and I didn't!
2.I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
4. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
5. Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive.
6. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
7. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
8. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
9. I'm not a complete idiot. Some parts are just missing.
10.Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
11. God must love stupid people; he made so many.
12. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
13. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
14. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
15. Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it!
16. Wrinkled was not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up.
17. Procrastinate Now!
18. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
19.A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
20. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
21.He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.
22.A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand
times the memory.
23. Ham and eggs ... a day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment
for a pig.
24. The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.
25. I smile because I don't know what the heck is going on.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)